Meet Life Coach Houkje Ross
Community Building in the Washington, DC area!!
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SFP Editor: What kind of services does a life coach provide?
Houkje Ross: Life coaches usually work one-one one with individuals, either in person or over the phone. Depending on the life coach, sessions can run anywhere between 45 minutes to an hour and a half. Many life coaches are now providing tele-seminars to groups, usually around a specific theme such as weight loss or building a business.
SFP Editor: What kind of training do you have to consult as a life coach?
Houkje Ross: There are many training programs that provide basic knowledge and skills needed to help individuals and organizations to move through change. I am training with best-selling author and O Magazine columnist, Martha Beck. There are many other programs available.
SFP Editor: Do you have a particular approach or philosophy for being a life coach?
Houkje Ross: I strongly believe that each of us has unique talents and skills that we can bring to the world. Combine that with your personality, preferences, and life experiences and you will find the thing that will bring you the most satisfaction and joy.
I also believe that we don't pay enough attention to the present moment and are easily distracted by work, advertisements, cell phones, the internet, etc. that we have lost touch with the wisest part of ourselves...the part that can lead us to our most brilliant life. Part of what I try to do as a life coach is to bring individuals back to the present moment, so they better understand what their inner most self is craving and wants for the world.
SFP Editor: Should everyone see a life coach or is there a specific goal/reason to seek the guidance of a life coach?
Houkje Ross: Not everyone needs a life coach. If you are someone who is really good at overcoming obstacles, envisioning the life that you desire, and able to take the necessary steps to fulfill that vision...you probably don't need a life coach. My experience, however, suggests that we often get stuck in one or two of these steps. That's where a life coach can help. Each step along the way to a goal or new endeavor requires a different set of skills. A good life coach can help move you through each phase of change.
Having said this, the world I grew up in as did my parents, has changed dramatically in the last 20 years. My father held the same job for over 25 years. It wasn't until the early 1990's that his company was downsizing and he was forced to find another job. The expectation of our parents generation was that you would hold the same job for life and the employer would provide a pension on which you could retire. This is no longer the reality.
Stable, long term employment is now a rarity in almost all sectors that it once was (think auto industry, globalization, etc). I have held 5 different employers over the last 14 years. Most of my peers have had the same experience. This constant flux requires individuals to be able to navigate change more quickly and readily. But, our parents didn't teach us this, because they didn't expect to have to.
SFP Editor: When you first meet with a client, how do you explain the process and set expectations for the consultation?
Houkje Ross: I explain to clients that life coaching is a process that will help guide them through change. If they don't already know what their passions are...the process can help them to uncover the things that bring them the most joy, as well as help them to take steps to cultivate the specific activities, people, and atmosphere needed to keep that joy alive. Since I am a firm believer in the mind-body connection, I usually tell them that I will be asking a lot of questions about what their body is telling them in a given moment or in specific situations.
I ask that new clients commit to at least 6 sessions and I make sure to tell them that I will be giving them homework!
SFP Editor: What have you experienced in your life which has prepared you for this role?
Houkje Ross: It's not so much what I've experienced, but more of who I am that has prepared me for this role. I am an INFJ on the Myers Briggs Personality Profile. (Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Judging.) If you've ever taken the Myers Briggs Personality profile, you know that this is considered to be the 'counselor' personality. While I considered for a long time about becoming a therapist or counselor, I ultimately decided to pursue life coaching because I felt it was a more modern approach to problem solving.
INFJ Profile
"Idealist Counselors have an exceptionally strong desire to contribute to the welfare of others, and find great personal fulfillment interacting with people, nurturing their personal development, guiding them to realize their human potential. Although they are happy working at jobs (such as writing) that require solitude and close attention, Counselors do quite well with individuals or groups of people, provided that the personal interactions are not superficial, and that they find some quiet, private time every now and then to recharge their batteries. Counselors are both kind and positive in their handling of others; they are great listeners and seem naturally interested in helping people with their personal problems. Not usually visible leaders, Counselors prefer to work intensely with those close to them, especially on a one-to-one basis, quietly exerting their influence behind the scenes."
-From Keirsey.com website, available at: http://www.keirsey.com/4temps/counselor.asp
SFP Editor: What brought you to the DC area and what do you enjoy most about the city?
Houkje Ross: I came to DC in 1996 after I graduated from the University of New Hampshire. I was visiting a friend who lived here and she recommended that I stay and look for a job. I took her advice, stayed, and found a job...and never left!
I love the diversity of people and culture that DC offers. I like that the city itself is small, manageable and has lots of green spaces. I also like that you can walk on the mall and see exotic orchids from South American at the U.S. Botanical Gardens, a T-rex replica at the Natural History Museum, and the Hope Diamond...all in one day. I told my boyfriend the other day that if DC were a T.V. channel, it would be PBS. I love it!
SFP Editor: What are you goals as a life coach in the next 5 years?
Houkje Ross: I am just beginning my journey as a life coach and am still in the process of figuring out my 'niche'. In the next five years...I would like to find that niche and to continue to hone my life coaching skills. I would eventually like to coach individuals to become innovators in their given field. Farther down the road, I would like to write a book that helps individuals to better understand themselves and the world around them.
SFP Editor: Can you recommend reading materials for folks to improve how they live their lives?
Houkje Ross: There are so many great books out there. A few that I recommend:
- Finding Your Own North Star, Martha Beck
- Wishcraft, Barbara Sher
- Do What You Are: Discover the Perfect Career for You Through the Secrets of Personality Type Paul D. Tieger
- Strengthsfinder 2.0, Tom Rath
- Loving What Is, Bryron Katie